How to Tell if your a Highly Sensitive Empath

How to Tell if your a Highly Sensitive Empath

How to Tell if your a Highly Sensitive Empath

Being a highly sensitive empath  is not easy in a world full of chaos.  Highly sensitive people are prone to shyness, anxiety, fearfulness and are most likely to be introverts.

Do you know someone like this? Someone you love? Perhaps a teenager or young adult?

They often withdraw in social situations rather quickly, back themselves into a corner, or stand apart when in a crowd of people. Maybe they react adversely and it seems unnecessary.

Being highly sensitive doesn’t have to hurt.

Highly sensitive people perceive deeply and have a greater understanding of the subtleties of a  situation often keeping quiet to hide the depth of their understanding.

They have a six sense that allows them to read the surrounding energy of others. They can sense when someones words and actions are not in alignment.

Often they hide their innate perception to appear normal. This can lead to trouble however, when an individual is not in alignment with their authentic self. When highly sensitive empaths ignore their inner perceptions they often suffer from nu-eroticism, depression, anxiety, inhibitions and addictions.

These become the reactions and responses of a highly sensitive person in their normal state of interacting.  The medical community labels people as highly sensitive in the spiritual community it is called empathic, I have come to believe they are one and the same.

Growing up Highly Sensitive

I grew up unconscious that the emotions and  mood swings I experienced were not always my own. Extremely sensitive to the energy surrounding me, I would find myself angry, agitated, sad or extremely happy for no reason known to me. This often led to inappropriate responses to life.

I would explode in anger for no reason, feel reckless, withdraw completely or become overly loving towards people or situations with no understanding as to why I felt those emotions.

The radical way I dealt with life often had me labeled as a troubled kid, overly knowledgeable, over reactive. I was ignoring the truth of my own intuitions about people and situations and it led me to unhappiness , depression and anxiety. On my journey I did become depressed, anxious, abused drugs as a teen and alcohol as an adult.

It wasn’t until I got sober that I learned the underlying energy and emotional sensitivity. In reality , I was taking on other peoples moods and emotions as my own. I did not know how to transform them into something more manageable or recognize they were vibes from someone else.

When I became a Reiki practitioner I started to understand what was happening to me. For the previous 6 years I had been working on my personal growth and had developed a spiritual basis for my life which helped balance my emotions and anxiety to liveable state. When I learned what an empath was I finally understood the underlying problem.

I got the book The Reluctant Empath from a friend and everything came into focus. I learned how energy worked. Energy is not just something we expand when we exercise. Energy encompasses our thoughts and emotions as well.

The Authors Steve Wilson and Bety Comford did a wonderful job of explaining the unseen reality of energy in their examples. I learned about myself in this book along with some useful ways to work with the energy I experience. Their book amped up my personal growth and ability to handle adversity.  Here are the personal gifts I received from reading this book


This was the most important tool that I have learned in my life , sadly it took so long to discover. Being highly sensitive I have consistently tried to numb the pain and escape the emotions that I’ve felt, grounding helps me transform and transmute it all so that I feel stable and balanced. It is also something that I tend to resist and need to work towards consistently.

Planet earth and blue human eye – “Elements of this image furnished by NASA”

Better to be quiet: The Chameleon  

I had always lived my life trying to blend in with other people, Consciously readjusting myself to appeal to others. Becoming a people pleaser and a doormat, subject to abuse from narcissist. I did this with boys, friends, adults , bosses, etc. at the cost of losing my own authenticity. Empaths try to fit in, yet the truth of the energy can never conform and feel good to us. I remained quiet at my own expense, Now I am able to give voice to my own thoughts and emotions without feeling I have to conform to the ideals of others. I am free to recognize my unique qualities allowing myself to flourish in any environment. 

It’s a purpose not a curse 

In this book I recognized that being Empathic is part of my purpose. I am here to help others on their journey, Being highly sensitive allows me to read others energy and emotions more easily. Learning how to use my gift I am able to help ground negative energies that I am surrounded by, making a peaceful environment for all.

Manifesting :Beware of your thoughts

In the book it became apparent that thoughts become things rather swiftly sometimes. Looking back at my life I realized that my thought patterns manifested many of the difficult situations I encountered. The easiest way for me to explain this is the expression “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with”.

During periods of my life when I surrounded myself with people who had negative out looks on life I had the negative things happen. The same with spending time with positive thinkers. When I met my husband he was filled with positive thoughts and infinite possibilities . I did have to release my marriage as well, I didn’t realize that the positivity from the beginning masked a narcissist and empath co-dependent situation that unfolded slowly over years.

Making Peace

Taking the time to reconnect with Nature makes peace in my life. Restoring and renewing my inner nature. Peace comes when I flow with the energy of the world rather than resist it. I am an observer of the energy now and watch it harmonize with my environment.

If you are highly sensitive or have a loved one who is, I hope you gain a better understanding outside of what the medical community may explain to you. In any situation their is always the unseen and the not proven. We were not meant to live a life of continuous pain. Pain is an indication there is something we are not addressing.

A Highly sensitive empath in constant emotional turmoil because of energy sensitivity can succumb to many ailments.

We are spiritual beings living a human existence, it is important to examine how the body , mind and spirit connect in any situation to receive true healing and the ability to easily function in this chaotic world.

Examine your life , where is a high sensitivity causing you pain?

Is there a way you could shift this pain by being an observer?

Are all the feelings you have really coming from you?

How do you find peace?

I challenge you to seek the answers to these questions, it is there that peace and authenticity will be found and your pain will diminish.

Love and Blessings,

Charlene ❤️🙏✨

7 Ways to Relieve Pain and Find Wellness with Reiki

7 Ways to Relieve Pain and Find Wellness with Reiki

Do You feel that?

That little signal in your body that starts to pull at you slowly, drawing you in, your awareness of pain starting to rise, the clue your wellness is fading. Did you know you can relieve pain and find wellness with Reiki?

You’ve been taking care not to antagonize the pain, thinking it would lay dormant, but for some reason today it has decided to engulf you. You down a few of those over the counter pills hoping you can get ahead of the pain, but you can still feel the dull ache building.

You’re probably wondering how long it will last this time. You’re pretty sure your not going to feel up to going to the gym after work. You probably even have accepted the fact you may not sleep well tonight because of the pain.

You become consumed by the thought that pain may ruin your weekend and  your enjoyment of life has plummeted. You know you will lack the energy to pursue anything short of sitting on the couch and you’ve blocked any inspiration to seek help for your pain.

The doctors have given you little hope.

So you give up and just accept it as your reality.

But is it reality? Is there some other way to feel comfort from this pain that often sidelines you?

There just might be. You see, in the eastern cultures when someone is in pain the “doctors” treat the mind and spirit along with the body. They look at wellness as the whole person being in harmony. Often when the body is in pain it starts with the dis-harmonizing of the mind and spirit , a disruption of your energy.

You may recognize this as the feeling of distress you feel when you’re in pain. The pain consumes your thoughts and you have difficulty enjoying the simple things in life.

https://EmbracingLifeNow.as.me/DistantReikiThere is a healing technique that originated in Japan called Reiki. It has become common in many countries and is often used in hospitals as a complementary service to treatments for chronic illness like cancer and rehabilitation of the body.

Reiki is used to help patients with pain BEFORE the medication starts working. I learned this as a hospice volunteer and furthered my knowledge when I listened to several doctors and nurses from Spaulding Rehab center in Boston explain that they were all Reiki trained and used reiki before the painkillers have a chance to work.

It also is used to help lower anxiety and create a sense of calmness in patients before, during and after treatments.

The great thing is you don’t need to be hospitalized to receive Reiki it can become part of your sacred self-care routine. I share Reiki in person with clients on in Hudson, Ma as well as provide distant reiki healing over the zoom for clients who live far away.

Here are some of the ways that Reiki can help you relieve pain and restore you to feeling more blissful.

1. Stress

The more stress you are experiencing the more aware you are of pain. Stress causes our body to be on high alert with all nerves firing and creating awareness to dis-ease in our body.

The funny thing is that I have had clients who will rate they have pain, yet have no physical pain to point too, they are referring to stress and emotional pain they are experiencing.

When you unwind in a comfortable setting the worries of the day seem less intrusive and your wellness improves. A Reiki treatment room is often a place set to harmonize the mind and spirit with soft music or silence, your choice, Soft lightning and a massage table set up for your personal comfort.

I provide aromatherapy for clients who enjoy scent to help them release their stress. Reiki creates a comfortable space to unwind those knots that bind you up during the day, releasing the tension and pain so when you go home you are more likely to enjoy your family time.

relieve pain
A woman is sitting on a wooden bench, leg up, knee bent, and resting her elbow on her knee. Her head is resting against her hand. She is deep in thought, tired. In her other hand, she holds water.

2. Energy level

Reiki can help restore your energy when you feel drained. When the body is in pain or if you are running yourself ragged with errands it can often drain you and you become energetically depleted. High emotional states can drain your energy as well.

Reiki allows universal energy to flow gently through you, which raises your internal vibration. Often clients get off the table feeling like they’ve had a good rest, at the same time, any feeling of tension or internal unrest releases.

An added benefit is you tend to breathe more deeply during a session and by default take in more oxygen which raises the energy level of your cells giving you the physical sensation of wellness and restoring the flow of energy to the body. Although some clients have trouble settling in and require several appointments to learn how to relax and accept the energy.

3. Sleep

There is no better self-care than sleep, Insomnia is a problem for most people at some point in their life. Some even experience it on a regular basis.

Do you get at least 8 hours a night? Many women I know get overwhelmed with their to do list and end up planning tomorrow at bedtime, then have trouble falling asleep due to their busy mind .

Reiki can calm the mind and restore your bodies natural sleep rhythm. It helps to release some of the trivial thoughts and tensions that we carry. Reiki can align you with your higher mind and all those thoughts that seemed so urgent can lose some of their power.

Making it easy to release some of those persistent worries so that you sleep more peacefully.

4. Clarity

Another way that Reiki can improve your wellness is to add clarity when you are trying to make a decision or seek change. It can help you to gain insight into what you truly want and opens the path of guidance on how to get there.

You can set an intention at your beginning of your session and often the answers you seek will show themselves within a day or two, if not during the session itself.

It can also bring to light what has been become a block to your success. A memory may come up during your session or later as a dream that gives you insight into what needs attention to be able to let go, make peace with the past and allow you to move forward.

During Healing sessions, readings , and Akashic sessions with clients healing often takes place naturally through our conversation and reiki flows on its own.

5. Body Pain

Relief from body pain with reiki can be life changing . I have had hospice patients who were unable to get up, feel enough relief and energy that they were able to spend the rest of the day enjoying time with their family out of their bed or chair.

Reiki helps speed up recovery time after surgery, gives heart attack patients that receive reiki a shorter, healthier recovery and gives people who suffer everyday aches ease in their pain level and more mobility.

It is perfect to apply to new injuries as well. It can speed up recovery and diminish the amount of pain pills that you ingest if you dislike taking medication.

6. Spiritual Connection

Wellness can be improved by one’s spiritual beliefs and the feeling of connection to something greater than ourself. Reiki can fill you with a feeling of deep hope and contentment that people often find in their faith.

Reiki practitioners set sacred space for a session and are conduits for universal spiritual energy. During a session clients often feel blissful and in tune with something higher than themselves as they feel in touch with their guides, angels, and past loved ones. Many have spiritual experiences with consistent Reiki appointments.

7. Digestion

Modern day science is now pointing to our stomach as the brain of the body, Our bio-dome, which is in charge of controlling how our body breaks down the food we eat. They have found when we follow a poor diet it can cause inflammation in the body.

So those achy knees and body stiffness that so many people feel today begins in our digestion. During a session the most prominent feelings of reiki working can often be felt in the digestion. Reiki clears the energy of the chakra’s which run through the center of the body.

Traditional hands on reiki sessions start by treating the stomach area which releases energy directly through the digestion and main organs of the body.

Many clients who experience digestion problems and chronic conditions like crohn’s disease, etc. find that reiki can help move things along and give relief from internal distress or inflammation of the digestive tract.

Bliss out your Wellness with Reiki

The amount of body pain you feel is often relative to your own personal set point of wellness. If many of these set points rise with reiki you are likely to feel well. Left unbalanced with several of these points deficient, your perception of body pain will be higher.

After a reiki session you will leave feeling more settled, calm and ready to walk confidently into life.

Your wellness is within your control.

Attention to your mind, body and spiritual connection plays a role in your everyday experiences. Reiki can be an easy addition in your sacred self-care schedule and show great improvement in mobility, mental attitude and a calmer more radiant you.

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Love and Blessings,


7 Surprises When It Comes to Manifesting with the Moon

7 Surprises When It Comes to Manifesting with the Moon

Manifesting with the moon can lead to a surprising journey. You wouldn’t think that starting a ritual would become easy or stick. Normally it takes determination and dedication which requires you to be totally tuned in and mildly obsessed, But rituals can also fall away easily. Like the whole New Years eve resolution commitments.

How many have slipped away from you?

As humans we are a fickle bunch. We get disappointed with our results and give up too easily. Even on the very things we desire the most. Since I started manifesting with the Moon Cycles, somewhat haphazardly, I have learned quite a lot about cycles and rhythms.

They happen all the time! Our behaviors and habits run in cycles. Our motivation has to have a rhythm. And our mind thinks in cycles as well, somewhat on a continuous loop. It is in our best interest to create a steady low pulsing rhythm for our mind that is focused on our truest desires. And that is why Moon Manifesting will change your life.

Moon Manifesting gives us time for quiet reflection and to observe the divine within us. We crave the opportunity to see what the universe has in store, but it is truly in our own hands to receive the things we seek.

Here is what I have learned that surprised me about manifesting with the moon.

1. Bonding with the Natural Rhythm of Life

I embodied the fact that I was a part of the universe, although just a speck upon this planet. It put me in touch with the ebb and flow of life. I understood more about how energy strengthens and fades within the moon cycle and within my own emotions. There are periods during the moon cycle that my emotions and commitments are stronger and times when it is less intense. This helped me create more balance in my life and become observant of the space of time in a month.

2. Things Must Die for New Things to Live

Moon cycles support the life cycles of many plants and creatures. Just like the cycle of life, our manifesting depends on letting old practices, beliefs and thought patterns die to allow the birth of new perspectives. If we want to manifest something we have never had or done, we need to make space for it and remove the old obstacles that have been holding us back. The full moon is a perfect time for reflection, forgiveness and acceptance before we create something new.

3. Ancestral practice

I had been on the spiritual path for years, yet when It came to my ancestral ties, I never thought much about them when it came to manifesting. My moon practice had a major shift in the beginning that enlightened me to the fact that if I made changes in my life it was not only for me, it was also for all my ancestors who had the same desires and struggles. I realized how important it was to call upon my ancestors for understanding and support in how certain patterns have played out In our family history. 

This allowed for a practice of healing our family for the past and future. 

4. Facing Challenges and Finding Solutions

I shouldn’t have been surprised that looking at challenges and finding solutions would be a major player in manifesting. It is the reason after all that I started the journey. My moon ritual enabled me to look fully at my life twice a month and hone in on what was working and not working. There was no more pushing things to the side. It gave me a chance to gently push myself further than I had before either searching for new things to support my desires or realize that they actually were something I no longer wanted. I gained clarity on a regular basis.

5. Commitment to Myself 

Twice a month I had a formal commitment to myself, its like a twice a month date with destiny highlighted with a reminder in the Sky! Everything we do takes commitment. As a sober woman I have a commitment not to drink on a daily basis. If I want my life to have meaning I better be committing to things that are going to bring me spiritual and emotional growth. My ritual provides me with a chance to constantly recommit to the life I want to lead as a sober woman.

6.Fresh Start

Who doesn’t need a fresh start once in a while? When I started this monthly ritual it gave me the opportunity to have a fresh start every new moon and full moon. At the new moon it has been a chance to consider new avenues to pursue. Where do I want to go next, what am I lusting to try? The full moon has provided me with fresh starts in how I look at relationships and moving past trauma’s and painful memories. I use Ho’Oponopono in my practice so I clear my memories and spiritual vessel for new energy. I always feel lighter and brighter in my energy and outlook after ritual.

7. Connection and Balance

This moon practice has me feeling more connected to people, my guides and ancestors acknowledging  our shared experiences and energies. It has given me the chance to balance my energy with others and master a more even exchange and flow. Leading up to new moon I’ve learned to soften and harness  my feminine yin energy and as the new moon energy turns masculine and more yang closer to the full moon I’ve found a stronger energy within for connection to work more hustle into my mostly serene life. It’s taught me how to flow more with the energy I encounter.

These surprises have come as a bonus in my moon manifesting. Along with the many changes that have manifested in my life the past year and a half I have gained new freedom. I realize more frequently that it is easy to start over and manifest  the things I currently desire. There is always possibilities and new perspectives to be discovered. These have been blessing in my life and the lives of the students who have walked the path with me. If you are thinking about starting a moon practice I would encourage you to begin. You will gain many surprises for yourself and enrich your life.

Love and Blessings,


7 Secrets to Choosing Joy over Negativity

7 Secrets to Choosing Joy over Negativity

 Admit it, sometimes you can’t help it.

You start comparing yourself.

You notice someone who looks happy and well adjusted smiling at everyone and realize that the small annoyances that would send you over the edge, barely puts a wrinkle in their joyful glow.

What is their secret?

Did they start out with an unending flow of joy juice rushing through their veins? They are human and are faced with the same defeat, disappointment and the occasional bout of sadness you encounter. 

Everyone has moments when they don’t receive the outcome they were expecting. When their hopes are dashed by someone with power over their life or they lose something they adore like a job, relationship or personal belongings.

Those are the moments when you are most likely to fall deeply into a pattern of negativity. When you mire in grief and are unable to see clearly the choices that are available. 

It is those moments that negativity can take root and you lose hope of ever having a joyful moment. Instead, you worry about what else will come between you and that perfectly tended feeling of joy.

Based on the circumstances, you forget that you can just choose joy.  As someone who may be new to the spiritual path It is in your powerful hands to learn something new. Here are some of the secrets to choosing joy over negativity.

1. Be Vigilant About your Thoughts.

Thoughts pour through your mind quickly sometimes, especially if you are new to the spiritual path, slow your thoughts down. Become aware when your thoughts are an endless stream of your to-do list peppered with rants of negativity. 

Create an awareness of what thoughts are worth keeping. Let go of the ones that are negative to make space for an uplifting thought. Also pay attention to the tone and language of your inner voice.

2. There is No Time Like Now

When you stay in the moment and intentionally think about how things are in the present, you will usually find that things are O.K. The removal of thoughts of the past or constantly focusing on the future is where negativity plays dirty and sucks all the fun out of life.

Recognize the great benefit of just enjoying the moment and the joy to be found in the present moment. Hang onto the the simple feeling of just being. 

3. Reframe for A Reality You Love

We always have a choice and can choose to focus on the reality we want, it only takes reframing what is available to us. I know that sounds a little weird and new age, but bare with me. 

When you notice a negative thought ask yourself what the direct opposite would be. You do not need to imagine how that reality will happen, only how you would feel if it does come true. It is the feeling that you’re going for.

Do not limit your reality based on your current circumstances . If you are having trouble believing a certain reality is possible for you, look around for success stories. The world is full of inspiring turn arounds!

Use other peoples stories as proof that you can have it too.

4. Learn from Successful People

When you notice someone who is joyful, be willing to be vulnerable with them. 

Ask questions, find out their secrets for joyful living. How do they work out their negativity? 

We all get sucked into negativity, but some people have good strategies to overcome difficult mindsets. Ask them for help, their solutions may work for you. Especially if you are in recovery or a highly sensitive person, it can be difficult to understand a different way of being if you’ve always been living from a place of feeling overwhelmed, lacking  or misunderstood. 

5. Be Honest with Yourself

When you are honest with yourself about your situation you are able to develop acceptance. Acceptance of how things are in the present moment and then acceptance that you have the ability to change.

For example if you are deeply in debt but living beyond your means, you are going to have a difficult time feeling joyful when you spend money.

There will be an internal disconnect in your subconscious that tells you you can’t afford what you are buying. That silent thought will undermine any feeling of happiness and fulfillment for the things you buy. Leaving you feeling empty inside. 

When you are honest about your finances and rein your spending habits to be more in alignment with what you can afford, you will feel an internal freedom to enjoy what you purchase. 

6. Forgive  Everyone

When you hang onto grievances it is like a memory eraser. You will only remember your negative experiences with the people who hurt you.

You do not have to make nice with them in person, hug or kiss and be friends or family again. However, you do have to forgive them in your heart. Remember the blessing of the lesson they taught you and how it highlights your desire for people to treat you differently.

If forgiveness is something you struggle with join me for the Moon Manifesting Mastery group we practice forgiveness at our full moon rituals, the link is below.

7. Share your Gifts

When you offer you’re gifts to the world you will feel a deep sense of joy. Gain knowledge of your strengths and offer them every chance you get. Volunteer to help a friend or family member with something they are struggling with or find a volunteer position that uses your strengths and passions.

The act of giving yourself freely without any expectation of return will give you a great sense of fulfillment.Choosing joy over negativity is available as an option in every situation you encounter.You were born to create the life you desire. You have the ability to create from your heart the experiences that will give you the most joy.

Love & Blessings,




How to Spark Creativity Daily

How to Spark Creativity Daily

Where do you get your best ideas?

Have you had those lightning fast moments of brilliance that come when you least expect it and fill you with excitement.

The spark of creative inspiration.

The awesome solution to a problem that you have been slaving over that just pops into your mind in an instant.

I get my best ideas in the shower.

The white noise of the water is an excellent conduit to amplifying my creative thoughts. Recently they have been happening often and I write them down in a hurry so when I am ready to take action they are there to expand upon.

Creativity comes from within, uninhibited if we let it…

These thoughts come from my own intuitive guidance, insight for the next step in my life. First of all, Water is free flowing energy. Energy is all around us and within us, (think of science class and the atom) and thoughts are energy as well. I have learned a lot about energy in the past few years as I have become fascinated about how to release blocked or stagnant energy with Reiki and Life Coaching methods. 

Releasing the stuck energy and negative thought patterns in order to be a success is a difficult and sometime long process.

Yet it can be as simple as taking a shower.

It seems crazy to say, right?

Well, try it.

What is your deepest desire?

Think about it the next time you shower.

What is keeping you from your deepest desire?

Think of the story you are living that tells you why you haven’t received your desired result. Think of the consistent thoughts you have around the story. How are they keeping you stuck in the same circular pattern of not being successful at receiving what you want?

Let all those thoughts be washed away from the shower. Watch them go down the drain one by one until their is no more obstacles and no more story.

There is only your deepest desire left.

How does it appear now?

Visualize in vibrant color, and let go of the obstacles…

Create the perfect vision in detail.

How does it feel different?

Do this several times in the shower and write down your great ideas.

This is your life to create.

Once you let go of any stuck energy and negative thought patterns you will be well on your way to getting spontaneous moments of great inspiration.

You will also begin to let go of fears, anxiety and stress that are born out of spending our day in the muck of negative thinking.

Fear , anxiety and stress will evaporate slowly the more you practice this exercise. As a result of letting go of negative thought patterns you free yourself to live a life full of Joy. Your dreams and visions are worth the few minutes of thought in the shower that would otherwise be filled with the grocery list or rehashing the argument you had with your family member.

Creativity on the Go…

Look for your action steps to manifest your desire as you go through your day. What are you noticing? Creativity doesn’t just happen when you sit down with pen and paper, paint or crafts.

Creativity happens in life.

People give us inspirational thoughts, they may step in and present us with an idea or offer to help with getting what we desire.

Manifest your dream by paying attention to the serendipitous acts that happen. Little cues that remind you of your deepest desire as you go through your day.

Become conscious of your thoughts .

The energetic impact of negative thinking is damaging to every part of your existence and life experience. It keeps you from being successful.

Allow creativity to show itself.

Stay glued in believing you will receive the experience you desire and you will be well on your way. Creative solutions surround you daily that can transport you to your greatest desire.

Love and Blessings,

Charlene ❤️🙏✨

4 Energy Worker Secrets for Empaths who Feel Powerless

4 Energy Worker Secrets for Empaths who Feel Powerless

4 Energy Worker Secrets for Empaths who Feel Powerless

I know, it may be hard to admit. But as an empath do you ever feel powerless? You wake up feeling ready for the day, looking forward to a light day at work and then someone walks in and sucks the life out of the room.They leave you feeling like you wish you had called in sick. Uneasy about a confrontation that involves sending them away you keep quiet and let the internal pressure rise.

Your level of uncomfortable vibes goes up as your peace goes down. 

You can’t concentrate, never mind enjoy the easy day you had planned. Physically drained you feel the stress and tension in your neck and shoulders every time they enter the room. You wonder when you can look forward to the day when you no longer have to spend time with them.

The Energy Vampire has gotten control and it has been going on for far too long. As an Empath you have the superpower of being able to feel energy and the ability to shift it.

I know, you’ve tried everything to get them to leave you alone. You often excuse yourself in their presence. Under the pretense you have important work to attend to or a meeting soon. The more you walk away, the more urgent they become to follow you. You feel like you just can’t get a break and you feel the emotional and physical drain happening more often.

The first thing you need to do is acknowledge the fact that you have energetically given them permission to treat you this way.

 Think back to the very first time you met them. How did you interact with them? Where you polite and giving all of your empathy to their particular story?  Were you eager to please so you agreed with most of what they were saying, flaunting your supportive side?

Your thoughts are the energetic vibe your send out. The body language you use and the demeanor you have when you first meet someone sets up who has the power in the relationship.

And it is not never too late to change the energy of the relationship and still remain the wonderfully gifted and caring empath that you are to everyone.

If you find yourself in this situation there are several things you can do to regain your sense of control whenever you notice people are draining you. It is easier than you think to change the energy of the situation.

1. Energy Management to gain back control

The first thing is to start to consciously feel the energy around you. Most people have experienced walking into a room and becoming aware that an argument has taken place or something funny has just happened without actually being a witness with their own eyes.

Have you ever experienced this? You sense it through you own energy field and chakra system.  

  • Exercise: While you are sitting think about the energy surrounding you, What does it feel like? Then concentrate on how your energy feels? How does it change when you breathe in and out. Start paying attention to this on a regular basis. I promise you will start to learn to read the vibes that surround you. 
  • Once you learn how your energy feels, you can gain the ability to control it. This is done by exercises called grounding. Grounding is when you collect any negative energy, thoughts or body pain and send it through your body and down into the earth. It is easy to learn, simple to use and the best part is no one can tell you are doing it. 

Although, the energy vampires will feel the shift, they won’t understand that it is you using your gift as an empath to move energy.

Grounding by itself has the ability to turn your day around when you use it. Most spiritual people understand that grounding connects us to the earth and gives us a sense of feeling present in our body but many do not realize that we are actually detoxing ourselves from errant energies.

This is the most important tool to put in your toolbox of empath skills. Grounding removes the electric charge to any situation. It returns you to a peaceful state of being.

2. Good Vibrations to Empower and Renew

The vibes you send out are as critical as the vibes you are receiving when you want to feel empowered. When you go into a situation and send out a vibe that is expecting negativity you will get negativity in return. Thoughts are energetic things.

The majority of the time you do not even realize you are sending out an expectation of negative receiving. Our internal vibe is set when we are very young. We experience life and our vibe matches the people around us. 

If they are set to a low vibe we will match that vibe. Have you ever heard of the phrase “ You are most like the 5 people you spend the most time with” Well if your vibe is set higher you will feel other people pulling you down to their level if you are sensitive to energy. It is not a good feeling and difficult to protect yourself when you are unaware of its power. 

You can raise your vibe by experiencing positive emotions on a regular basis. Some ways to accomplish this is to practicing gratitude, meditation, connecting with nature, prayer and healing trauma or forgiving damaging experiences of your past. 

  • Exercise : When you encounter someone who feels low energy to you and you want to gain back control, simple raise your vibe by breathing into your heart space and sending them love and gratitude with your exhale. It sounds crazy but if you practice this you will notice a change in their demeanor. They may appear to shift into a good mood or you will see them physically relax and you will feel the tension leave the room.

Practiced on a regular basis you will be able to breath fresh energy into your feelings around old relationships. You can’t change the other person or their vibe but you can change how you feel about them.

3. Finding your power through Wonder Woman

Body Language sends a Powerful Message as an empath you may often take a protective stance. Be conscious of the cues you are sending out. The more you open up your body and take up more space the more powerful you will appear.

The body language you display is important, people pick up on body cues instinctively. They unconsciously study you and quickly decide where you are in the relationship.  

Here is some science in a Ted Talk with Amy Cuddy, Professor and Researcher from Harvard that explains Power Posing. It is important to work on you posture, stance , etc. When you feel powerless you try to take up less space by scrunching or trying not to bump into those around us. You may appear to be protecting yourself in some way with your arms, Deferring to those who appear to be more powerful.

Exercise: Practicing powerful poses such as the wonder woman stance for 2 minutes while you are alone will give you confidence to take more risk rather than playing it safe and effect a 25% decrease in cortisol and an increase in testosterone. You will appear authentic, with strong presence and by practicing, your body will change your mind and you will become powerful.

4. Be an intentional Observer and Peacemaker

You do not have to let someone disturb your peace. Practice detaching from your judgments and emotions. Your mind will still feel a little helpless sometimes. Let go of anger as quickly as you can, remind yourself that you are in charge of how people make you feel. When you ground the negative painful energy you are feeling you are able to become an observer of the situation.

Observe the energy surrounding you, integrate any feelings you have and allow the situation to play out. When you observe with the intention of feeling peace you will instantly feel better. Look for opportunities to find solutions that will make both parties happy.

Practice your energy work on a regular basis alone so that you are able to utilize it in the moment. Take the frantic and errantic energy out of situation and find peace in the moment.

You are secret energy worker.

It is in your power to gain back control. There is no reason to continue to allow energy vampires or anyone else to control your feelings or drain your physical energy.

Breathe into your heart space and send out love and gratitude, you can feel it and receive it in return. Allow your heart to burst with joy and feel at peace with the people and the world around you. 

That is where your power lies.When you send that vibe into the world you change us all including the person with whom you felt powerless! This is your Empath gift have fun using it!